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January 14, 2006

Yahoo! buys a company before its foundation

SUNNYVALE, CA, Jan 11, 2006 (YARDLEYPRESS) — Yahoo! Inc. (Nasdaq:YAHOO), a leading global Internet company, today announced the acquisition of an unnamed Web 2.0 company three days before it was to be founded. “Yahoo! is committed to generating mass quantities of free public relations by acquiring more pre-revenue, pre-business plan companies than any other global Internet company,” said Chris P. Bacon, Director of Hype Production.

“We’ve been acquiring companies earlier and earlier - before VC funding, before revenue, and in some cases before the completion of their products,” explained Hugh Jorgan, newly-appointed Vice President of Pre-Business Development. “By buying companies before they’re founded, we move directly to the natural conclusion of the trend.”

Yahoo’s! Department of Compiling and Distributing Favorable News Clippings to Executives is already girding itself for the inevitable deluge of laudatory press. “I mean, our latest ‘acquisition’ was described by its author as ‘buggy software,’ which ‘may and probably will crash your browser or cause your computer to burst into flames’, but it still became one of the most discussed topics in the industry,” laughed Director of Stapling Kerry Oki. “This time around, we’re expecting nothing less than the establishment of a major religion.”


Reply from Yahoo?

Ah, satire. If you ever wonder whether you company is getting a reputation, just wait for the blogosphere to make fun of you.

(Jeremy Zawodny)